Out of character

I'm not sure why I picked "dating strategies" as the category for this post, as I'm not sure I would ever recommend this one! I did something completely out of character for me last week, and whilst I'm seeing the funny side, I've now also got myself in deeper, which will probably involve further out of character behaviour!!

But let me start at the beginning. We had our office xmas party on Thursday night. Just to explain, whilst there are only 6 people working for my company, we share office space with about 12 other companies in the industry and we're part of rather a large, happy family as it were. So every year the biggest company that we all rent space from, throws a party for all of us!

There are about 10 of us - all from various different companies that have developed quite a nice friendship. We generally meet at the bar at work a couple of times a week for an after work drink, and I've got to know and really like some of them.

Aaannnyyyway = this is turning into a novella - I had a "little" too much wine at the party and for some reason, right at the end of the evening, I decided to walk up to one of the guys and kiss him! I HAVE NEVER EVER made a move on a guy - EVER! He was a little shocked and all he said was "wow - you really are a cutie!" I then climbed into a taxi and went home!

I woke up the next morning and actually had a chuckle at my brazen behaviour until it dawned on me that I would have to face him on saturday, at yet ANOTHER xmas party! We're friends, I like him, but nothing more than that!

So saturday comes along, and the first thing I did was walk up to him and apologise for my bad behaiour! He was such a sweetheart. He gave me a big kiss on the cheek and told me that he was sort of hoping that I would behave "badly" again that night! It was the weirdest thing. I looked at him at that moment and realised that I actually DO like him! Clearly my wine sozzled brain was trying to tell me something on Thursday night!

Thats when it started! I have this terrible urge to "hide" that I like someone - when I do I turn myself inside out to act the opposite! And he really did try with me - he flirted - I blocked - the entire evening! UGH! I',m such a fool!

So now I've realised that I've sent this sweet guy really crappy mixed signals and I'm going to have to rectify it! And the only way I know how to do that is to come straight out and ask him out!

In a way I think maybe I'm being tested by the universe - I did say a while ago that I had to change my dating strategies - I'm just not sure if this was completely the right way to go about it!