Can Anyone Else Relate to This?

OK so I guess I should start this with a little background. About nine years ago I sort of gave up on dating. I retreated into the safety of my appartment and burried myself in video games and my career. I thought I was happy being alone and prety much figured that I would be that way the rest of my life.

But a few weeks before my 42nd birthday I had sort of an awakening. One night I was feeling so alone and despised what I had let myself become. I was 275 ounds, looked like hell, and felt even worse. Then like a light switch being flipped on I decided to flip my life around 180 degrees. Since that time I have lost over 50 pounds (with several more to go), I have seen doctors and a dentist and started repairing the damage I did to my body and my self esteem. And I am starting to feel prety damn good about myself again.

To work on the lonlieness part of my life I joined several online dating services. However after sending out over a hundred interest notifications on several different sites and sitting back and waiting for several weeks not a single one replied. This was destroying my newfound self esteem. So I have since cancelled all of these accounts.

Something happened in last several weeks though. I met this woman named Cara. She is single and not seeing anyone, she is 14 years younger than me, has a 4 year old son, and is a co-worker of mine. One day at work while talking with her I started to feel something I hadn't felt in at least 13 years. I had butterflies in my stomach. And of course having taken so much time off from dating and because she is a co-worker I told myself that I should just try and suppress these feelings and move on with my life. It has now been 5 weeks since these feelings first surfaced and I still cannot shake them. Seeing her at work every day makes it hard for me to concentrate on my job.

I have talked with friends, posted on other relationship sites, and spent countless hours conteplating what I should do. I am trying to take their advice and remain friendly with her and hope that someday I will have the courage to ask her out. But at this point I am not sure that I can handle whatever the outcome would be positive or negative. But someday when I feel I can I am sure I will ask her out. I am sure that I could not live the rest of my life not knowing.

If anyone else has had a similar experience or has any words of wisdom I would appreciate hearing from you...

Some days I think I am going to go crazy...

The plan was for us to tag team every hour or two basically until everyone was gone, the owner said "we are going to try and just not close." I was looking forward to a five am minimal set!
I had never played next to this Jimmy kins character, but was I in for a surprise.
















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